Over the past week, I have interacted with several youth and adults. I made it a point to ask them about their thoughts and feelings regarding COVID-19. Here were some of the responses:
· “My dad thinks it’s the Chinese people’s fault but I think it’s from not washing our hands”
· “I don’t want to die”
· “I am more worried about school because we are now online and I can’t learn like that”
· “I’m young so it won’t bother me…so I don’t see what I have to stay inside”
· “I felt scared when we went to the grocery store and there was not really anything there”
· “I feel like we’re in a zombie movie”
· “I am worried about my grandmother who lives alone on the other side of the border”
These are heavy thoughts and feelings, and you are not able to tell which responses came from a child versus those that came from an adult. We are all trying to make sense of the world but each of our perceptions are shaped by a variety of outside factors that truly personalize the relationship with COVID-19.
Thoughts and feelings ultimately connect to behaviors. All behaviors come from an unmet need. For example, if you have a need for food and shelter then you will likely behave by getting a job to earn the money for the items you need. It is somewhat different for youth because they may or may not be able to express their needs. We can definitely see their behaviors (slamming doors, using drugs, fighting, running away). These behaviors can show up in stressful times.
The child may need to feel love, safety, clarity, and support but they may be reacting from such an emotional place that all we are given are complex behaviors. Sometimes adults can follow the same pattern. For example, current stressors may create an internal need for safety and reassurance. For an adult that has not developed the emotional capacity to process this internal need he/she may turn to alcohol or drugs. Others may choose to turn to becoming addicted to complex relationships. All these behaviors are rooted in an unmet need.
As a trauma therapist, I work to uncover the underlying needs through seeking to understand the behaviors. I focus on the use of tools and interventions that align with your level of comfort. I have come to learn that most behaviors are connected to some traumatic event or stressor. I focus on helping children, teens, and adults strengthen their emotional capacity to express themselves in health ways resulting in a reduction of complex behaviors.
Contact me today for a consultation. In-person and tele-medicine options available for your peace of mind.
www.noblepathcc.com
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